“When we blame, we give away our power” — Greg Anderson
Whenever something occurs out of our expecting zone, many of us make assumptions, it must be someone else fault, it must be because of this and that. Blaming has become a part of our lives, we are used to with it .We blame others about our actions and forget about our reactions.
Blame can be defined as holding others responsible for our misfortunes. Some people cast their dysfunctional parents, negative relationships, socio-economic disadvantages, or other life hardships as the reason for their unhappiness and lack of success. While it’s certainly true that life presents many difficulties, and undeniable the pain and suffering they often cause, to blame others as the reason for one’s unhappiness is to cast oneself in the role of the victim.
There are illusory advantages to victim hood, as finger-pointing provides convenient justification for life’s unsatisfactory conditions, and sheds the work necessary to take complete charge of one’s own life and well being.
However, habitual blaming over time perpetuates bitterness, resentment, and powerlessness, as the victim suffers from what H.D. Thoreau calls “quiet desperation”.
We blame everything for its presence even we blame ourselves for our presence why I am here, I am this and that and in this way we start our day with blaming and end with blaming so there’s no improvement, no betterment.
At first we need to stop blaming others although it’s difficult but it’s not impossible. Start it with small thing, with small act .Yeah there’s some circumstances when others interrupt our actions but then how can we control the reactions of us that’s important. It’s we who can take the responsibility of every action of ours.
Notice what happens when you stop blaming others. When we stop blaming others for the circumstances and actions, we focus on ourselves, we use our energy our potential upon improving ourselves for betterment .Circumstances don’t make person but reveal them upon their selves and others. When we stop blaming others for circumstances and take the responsibility of our reactions then the change begins, betterment starts. For example when the house is mess rather than assuming that you’re only person who play your part, clean it up.
Blaming others takes great amount of mental energy and uses a lot of our potential it pushes us down and down and develops “drag me down” mindset that creates stress and depression. All that feel you pity about yourself and drag all your powers and then you waste all your energy on blaming others for your circumstances which reduces your potential and makes you worse. Then you have no work except blaming others and you feel others responsible for your life actions as your happiness, sadness all depends upon others behaviors’ and actions which you cannot control and in this way you lost your own self . Blaming makes you feel powerless over your own life.
When you stop blaming others, you’ll regain your sense of personal power. You’ll see yourself as a choice maker. You will feel your potential and save your energy that helps you to make your life better. You will focus on your strengths and weaknesses and you’ll have time and potential to appreciate your strengths and improve your weakness rather than blaming others. And you will realize that you are the one who’s responsible for every act of yours and can control every action of yours. You’re the one who can control you responses when you are happy and sad .No circumstances can completely alternate your actions until you allow them. You will feel life is beautiful above blames and assumptions.
Life is a great deal more fun, much easier to manage when you stop blaming. Let’s try and see what happens.