The horrific rape and murder case of Zainab Amin shook the whole country. A group of people, on social media, demanded the government to introduce sex education as a part of the curriculum to make younger kids aware of their body and the good and bad touch.
This demand stirred a whole new debate on the internet which failed to reach on any conclusion. With the time, that all debate vanished from the social media leaving the demand for justice for the rape victims there.
In January, #JusticeForZainab was the top trend on the twitter and now in April, it is #JusticeForNoorFatima. Do we have to demand justice everytime we hear of any such case?
Two days ago, #JusticeForNoorFatima made it to the top trend on the twitter. Noor Fatima was an eight years old. She went outside her house to buy some sweets but never returned. Later on, her family found her 90 percent burnt body, the medical report proved that the deceases was raped before being burnt.
Yes, she was just eight years old. Can you think of any reason an eight years old girl can call for rape?
Stop misleading your own self and the society. Stop proposing the same centuries-old not-gonna-work-solutions for this immediate to be addressed issue.
Now, the question arises if not that way then how can we make our country rape free?
In my opinion, following measures can help to end or to minimize the rape cases.
Raising better girls and boys
As a society, we are a house of evils. Let’s accept it. Acceptance of the issue is the very first and foremost step towards its solution.
Most of us are biased and have our own stereotypes. We have to stop transferring those to the next generations. To do so, obviously, we will have to change our attitudes and behavior as well.
Raising better sons and girls who do not believe in any gender roles and stereotypes can make our society safe over the time.
Sex education is the necessity of the time. Teach your kid about his/her body. Tell them that their body belongs to them.
Tell them about good and bad touch. Give them enough confidence that if anyone tries to touch them in an inappropriate way, they can come to you and discuss the matter freely.
Beside this, tell your relatives and friends to not touch your child as it violates his/her privacy. There is nothing wrong with it. You are just being protective for your child and as a parent, it is your right.
It should be mandatory for every couple to get pre-marital counseling or training on how to start a family. In Pakistan, the premarital counseling is all about how to perform well on the wedding night and how to handle saas and nand. We have to get our tiny brains out of this.
Marriage is not just about having sex, producing kids and getting the label of achi bahu and sakht launda. It’s a whole new responsibility.
Try to understand the essense of marriage. Ask yourself are you in a state to allow someone to be a part of your life? Are you able to give a secure environment to your kids? Do you understand what is it like to be a parent and what responsibilities are attached to it? If the answer to any of these questions is No then please have mercy on your future kids and do not marry.
Nuclear family system
It’s the time we should break the bubble of the ‘joint family system is a blessing.’ Stop depending on your family to live a life. Support the nuclear family system and take the reins of your life in your own hands.
In most of the rape cases, the rapist is a close relative. Keep your child at a distance from the people to define the boundaries. By this, I don’t mean that we should get isolated but what I mean is defining the limits and boundaries for the people.
By keeping our mouths shut
This is the most important thing which could solve 70 percent of our problems. Whenever any victim of rape or sexual assault tries to ring the justice bell its us who builds an unseen pressure on him and make him feel like an alien.
If you are not on the same page with them, even then keep your mouth shut. let them fight for themselves. let them do whatever they want to do with their life. If you still find it hard to keep your mouth shut then do one thing, talk about yourself. tell people that you are that log who don’t allow others to live or even die in peace.
I know it will take us time to make this society safe for our kids but till then let’s embrace the change. let’s change ourselves and our traditions which are proving havoc for the society on the whole.