The mother of an autistic child earns a star in heaven

“Autism is not a puzzle, nor a disease. Autism is a challenge but certainly not a devastating one.” – Trisha Van Berkel

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is the growing disability that some children suffer from. As a result, they undergo considerable communication, societal, and routine challenges. All the kids with autism don’t have the same complications; their brains grow and function in different ways. Several speak a little and some don’t speak at all. Some do repetitive things – repeat a sentence over and over again – are moody, and seem as though they are in their own world.

The mothers having children with special needs are not ordinary mothers. To grow a normal child may be a considerable task for the parents but not unusual, as everyone does this by choice. But to raise a child with special needs is something beyond extraordinary.

These mums have to deal with a whole heap of difficulties; individuals having narrow thinking typically don’t accept such children. They hold onto inciting and taunting in different ways– demoralising rather than giving strength– the strength of keeping on going to raise a special child without being despondent. At times, the family even doesn’t agree to accept the reality and doesn’t support as required.

As the kids are suffering from mental or physical disorder – the mothers of such children are also suffering equally – suffering due to the mental disorder of our society!

Yes, I would call it a mental disorder and the lack of understanding when most of the people of our society turn out to be so judgmental towards other person’s life that they disremember to be understanding, even forget what is more or less in their own lives. Sometimes our behaviour says a lot that we don’t utter with our tongues – and it can be hurtful to others. But we don’t bother.

Knowing certain mothers of autistic children having boundless vitality, I was amazed. The zest they hold within themselves is admirable. They are, no doubt, a thorough power bank of positive thoughts and enthusiasm.

Even though such courageous mums don’t need anybody – they are enough for themselves and their children – yet I think we must play a vital role in being amorous and accommodating to such children and mothers.

To admit and raise children with special needs, a ‘special society’ is not needed, but the acceptance, affection and efforts headed for such kids makes that society ‘special’.

Moreover, autistics get easily frustrated and act out in certain situations; it’s not easy to handle them at certain times. But their mothers do it – for their children – for themselves actually! Their heroism goes unseen and unrewarded, but they carry on looking after their child and his certainties.

I have known a mother with two special needs children. Whenever I happen to meet her, I can’t stop myself from being impressed by the passion that lady lives with – forgetting all her personal pains and worries she remains devoted to her children all the time. Always standing and supporting those mums, going through the situation similar to her.

It is true that you can’t feel someone’s pain unless you’re placing yourself into their shoes.

She has started a non-profit institute named Compass… A Direction for the mentally and physically affected children – that is working to give education, physiotherapies, speech learning and many other things that can aid to recover such children. She ultimately wanted to do the whole thing she could do, to support all the special needs children including her own.

There are many other people and institutes such as Rising Sun Institute for Special Children that are making efforts in this arena – by providing education, speech therapy, vocational training, physiotherapy and speech therapy leading to rehabilitation of such children.  And I salute these audacious people!

Can’t we make any effort, on our own? Efforts are not bound to financial support only, if we don’t have much money to invest, we can invest our time. We can give time to such a child so that their mother will have an afternoon free – give time in the institutes working for such children, so maybe we can become a reason of a smile on the beautiful face of any little angel. We can support by just showing our concern towards them.

In my opinion, autistics are a blessing to any parent. You might think how that’s possible.

But I say that it is possible! Yes, it is difficult, in fact very difficult, to keep a child into yourself for a long period and when they come to this world, the time of celebration comes – you get to know that Allah has probably put you in the most difficult challenge of your life by giving you a special child. At that moment, you don’t understand what to do. What will the family think? What will the people of society say? How will you carry on with all this? These are the questions possibly revolving in your mind. But with the passage of time that little angel given by Allah helps you to become courageous enough. They give you a new spirit and durable emotions to face the entire challenges daringly.

After the era of difficulties, therein lies calmness and happiness. These beautiful souls – away from evilness – far away from all the negativity – distant from sins – are the little stars, at last take you all along to heaven.

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  1. Mr Ansar Jawed says

    It is hard to imagine why Nooria Ali would want to write about such a coarse subject as the politics of this world! She has such a sensitive deep and an all encompassing understanding of the complexties of how a family can go through with a child so unique, precious and testing as the one with the condition of an Autism.
    Even the the mothers of the mothers of these children do not help when they see the frustrated situations of the effects of such a child and do make the wrong moves. It needs the patients of a Saint to deal with these souls. It is so inspiring and motivational to see how she observes us, the onlookers as the problem and not the child.
    Hats off to such an helpful understanding and advice given to us all with such subtle sensitivity.

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