I am two decades and a half old, a doctor by profession, and an aspiring linguist and writer. I am trying to find my way in the world, like the rest of the people.
I have a loving family that is really hard to get along with, at times, and I have a deep rooted aversion of social situations in which I have to make small talk with people I know nothing about.
10 years back If you would have asked me what I’d be doing 10 years later, my answer might have been vague,but I was always aiming high. I never thought I’d be satisfied with the kind of life people settle for in their 20s.
But here I am, sometimes brazenly wondering whether I am doomed to a mundane existence. Though, there’s something that I feel, which makes me say ‘No, I am not’ – I will get somewhere.
It is only recently that I discovered that ‘somewhere’ is not a certain milestone that I am hoping to achieve;it’s not something definite like appearing on TV with my own talk show, or writing a book, or becoming one of the best doctor world ever saw.
I have found that it’s the process of learning, the act of doing everything I do with honesty and pure emotion; this pursuit, towards which if I stay dedicated, I feel a sense of tranquility that is incomparable.
It is even better that the instant gratification I feel when I accomplish a goal.
It all started with taking stock of everything, organizing and micro-organizing the little details of my life (there will be more about it in the later posts). And then I monitored how much time I spent on social media on average (there are useful apps for that).
I was shocked out of my wits to realize that I spent almost half the day scrolling mindlessly on social media, going through things I mostly did not care about. I understood that it gave rise to a lot of negative attitude in my life.
It is another topic I’d love to talk about because at the moment, I feel liberated from the shackles of my own creation.
So I have dived head-first into the sea of knowledge. I am pushing my limits and each day I try to learn something new.I find an intellectual world that was always there, waiting for me.
On the internet, in the books, and in the real world, it turns out that there are people silently waiting to be heard, there is wisdom waiting to be discovered on the far side of this glamour, the pitfall which consumes the attention of most.
On my 24th birthday, in January, as I sat alone wondering about all the years that have gone by, I realized that this is the penultimate time. People my age are the protagonists in movies. In the books, characters my age are fighting their battles, searching for their love and discovering themselves.
We are looking at our seniors with regard for their knowledge, but at the same time there is an ineffable sense of satisfaction in having the edge of youth. We are the ones whom parties are about.
From throwing surprise birthdays for the children to celebrating the anniversaries of the old, we are the ones who are doing the running. We are the ones who breathe life into a party.
Children are too enthusiastic, the elderly are too less so. We are the ones who combine the excitement of childhood with sobriety of old age. And we are the ones whom this age, this world, this time is all about at the point.
This is the time to venture. To do anything.
Because we are doomed to a slippery slope of decline. Come 30s our bodies are going to start to betray. We are going to be all about the next generation.
The margin for errors,the time for making them is running short. We are going to be the nodding uncles and aunts in the background.
Characters our age will be the supporting characters, the mothers who are never taken too seriously, the fathers who are always at fault for doing something wrong no matter what they do, a bullet will be many times more likely to hit us rather the beautiful girl or the guy on screen whose jaw is chiseled to perfection. Our point of view won’t be taken up by a writer.
We will drop down the candidate list for any necessary organ transplant, tumble down the list of a second chance at life, because of our age alone. Because even in all politeness, the world will assume we have lived our story.
So let’s live that story?
Not for the fleeting moments of spotlight that have been the fate of everyone from the man whose joints ache so much that he can’t get a glass of water today to the withering, greying woman who once held the world in her palm.
Not with the fear that we are becoming fast irrelevant to the world. If we do justice to ourselves in this present moment, at whatever stage of life this present moment finds you, the rest of the life will be salable because the anchors of inner peace can withstand, if not deflect any storm.
Let’s LIVE our story, fearlessly. So that when the cruel turn of time makes us the audience, we do not look at the stage wistfully.
I am trying to do that every day now. It’s a conscious decision to take the driving seat of my life from convenient choices and giving it to informed and rational ones.
The time I spent on Facebook, can be spent learning a new language. The time I spent reading opinion pieces can be spent learning about completely different subjects from interesting YouTube videos. The negative association between TV and binge eating can be replaced by a pursuit of cardiac fitness.
After all, the choice is all yours.
It’s a journey, writing this piece itself is an example of it. Maybe my readership can be a part of it as they set out on their own journey.
Till we meet again!